It’s been months since I’ve actually posted something to my own website, that I pay for. You figure something would’ve clicked in my head like,
“Hey dumbass, you know you’re wasting money by not doing anything.”
But my only retort to that is hey, I’m still human. And by being human I still get burned out the way humans do sometimes. My friend Annie debate the other week about achievement. It started out with me telling her all the ways that I trick myself into being productive and moving my goals forward. She came out with the same thing I hear all the time.
“If you really want something, you’ll do everything to make it happen,”
…or something like that.
Of course my stubborn ass goes off about my energy levels and bad food, sleep deprivation, and the fact that I could want something so bad but still be ‘physically’ incapable of doing anything. I’m also a big believer in your environment stimulating your work ethic especially if it’s a creative endeavor. I don’t know about you, but I can’t be creative or motivated when my work area looks Robin Williams had a Jumanji party in it.
I’ve just summed it up as: easy to say, a little more complex as shit to do.
Yeah, that’s not very Zen of me.
But I must admit, that conversation stirred the stick in my gumbo to get me to quit making excuses and do something. Couple that with the fact that you can only take so long sitting around watching Burn Notice, or Psych, or whatever the fuck is available on my Roku.
So here I am, finally making a post. But in making this post I went ahead and decided to use a new design layout, to go along with a brand new motivation and of course the phoenix-rising-from-the-ashes metaphor.
I’ve had this site for three years now, and looking back I may have been way over my head. The ambition was there, but the experience was sorely lacking. Glad to say, I have some experience now.
Here are some problems that I’ve noticed with this site.
I had a classic case of doing too much.
- In an attempt to gain as much traffic as possible, I attempted to be everything to everybody. I planned my site out like a magazine with different topics of interests of varying degrees. Now for a team, this wouldn’t be a problem, but as a one-man show keeping up and writing for each topic just wasn’t happening. I just happen to be the type that’s interested in everything. I was also one of those kids that went through 6-9 phases a year during high school.
- Another problem is the design of my site had me coding more in my main framework to get posts to look a certain way. Every post had a little bit of HTML or CSS included. Definitely not a streamlined way of getting and idea out. Sometimes it would take me a few days to write one post because of all the technical hangups.
- Eventually this site became more of a chore with the added nonsense of social media and general marketing and networking. And that’s usually when my inner bully comes out and says, “Fuck you!” while holding out both middle fingers.
And then it all stopped.
Well I’m back now, and with a stronger drive to make shit happen. The last few months of being sick and feeling like I’m on my death bed does a lot to make a guy want to do something utterly fantastic before he dies. And that is what propels me now: my pending mortality. I realize I can’t be Connor MacLeod of the Clan MacLeod. Humans don’t live forever, and if there are some immortals out there…. You guys are assholes. *sigh
Here’s a principle that I keep in my head at all times: Keep Shit Simple!
Another one is: Purge And Burn!
So with those two principles in mind I’ve applied them to this site redesign.
As much as I love to call myself a JOAT (Jack Of All Trades) I’ve decided to limit what the focuses of my site are:
- To show off the work I make as an artist
- To write and discuss topics that come to me organically
When I say organically, I mean whatever’s on my mind or means something to me at the time. It’s easier to write when you’re in it. The words flow easier in that state. Compare that to having seven different topics and having to find something to talk about in each per month.
Now I know that might create more topics to talk about, but by not putting myself in the situation to force a post about a specific topic out of my butt, I can write more naturally about whatever falls out of my butt. Was that too graphic? Oh well.
This new design layout also allows me to not have to code so damn much and just focus on content which is a big plus. Now I won’t have as much customization as I once had with the Thesis theme for WordPress, but eh, that’s just a small downside.
So I hope you guys are ready for this new year. I have a file folder full of ideas/seeds and a few film projects already underway.
Also in the near future, watch out because I’m finally coming to YouTube. I have a few web series concepts I want to get off my chest, we’ll see what happens.
I’m also looking to start an army of superheroes. Details later.
P.s. If anyone finds any bugs or broken links around here, please let me know. I’m still adapting all my older posts to this new layout. But then again my site will always be “under construction.”
image: 241/365 by kennymatic